Tag Archives: Sour Cream Problems

The Stadium: A Sporting Chance at Decent Nachos

4 Jun

South Boston may seem a little off the beaten path, and indeed had long been off our nacho radar.  However, only the briefest of internet searches reveals that Southie is a veritable treasure trove of virgin nacho destinations (except for the Boston Beer Garden, which considering it is related to both great and terrible nacho destinations Brighton Beer Garden, the assorted Taverns in the Squares, Joshua Tree and Shitty Side, is something we will only approach with great caution).  In the interested of breaking new ground (and evening out the north-heavy Nacho Map), we ventured to The Stadium for some nachos and beeyah.  As much of a sports bar as you will ever find (the waitresses wear modified soccer uniforms, which, upon consideration, doesn’t make a lot of sense for an American sports bar), The Stadium was pleasantly uncrowded despite an impending Bruins playoff game.  And thence came the nachos:

  • Appearance: (7) Very colorful, but in an unsettling way.  Only canned condiments and pre-made chips are ever that bright.
  • Quality of Ingredients: (5) Jarred salsa, guacamole from a bucket, and the chips, while colorful, were a little stale.  The chili was good but had a strange hint of summer sausage flavor, which, while not unpleasant, was a little odd.  We were puzzled by the sour cream, which appeared to have some sort of chives mixed in, but with no discernible effect on the flavor.
  • Distribution of Toppings: (6)  While there was a fair amount of chili, the cheese was not entirely melted, which hampered distribution.
  • Price: (8.3)  In this age of nacho inflation, it’s nice to see a sizable plate of nachos, with chili for only $10.
  • Overall: 26.3.  These nachos were exactly what we expected from the place, nothing more, nothing less.  Edible, even enjoyable, but worth neither a long review or a return visit.

No one’s first time is all that great, right?  On to bigger and better Southie nachos!

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The Living Room: In Which Our House West Grows Up And Gets A Job In Finance

3 May
Here are few very unsurprising facts about The Living Room (Waterfront-ish): first, they have couches, which are extremely difficult to wrangle if you show up during happy hour. Second, we’re pretty sure they serve modernized “comfort food,” because that’s what you want when you’re in a living room. Third, because it’s located somewhere in between the inaccessible North End and the awfully distant Aquarium T Stop, we will probably never go back. I tell you unsurprising facts because we actually have nothing all that exciting to say about our nacho experience. Sure, we dominated trivia (“Shirley Temple of Doom” FTW!) and the actual food is probably excellent, but if the nachos are subpar and it’s more than two trains away, it’s not worth our time. Shall we review?
  • Appearance: (7) A colorful splash of tomato on top, but fashion police need to ask: what is it wearing?  With a topper of sour crem so ludicrously large and ornate, these nachos would fit right in at a royal wedding.
  • Quality of Ingredients: (6) unless you like sour cream (please see “Distribution), the flavors on this plate were somewhere between less-than- and rather-average. The tomatoes were peppery and yummy, and complimented the jalepenos nicely (yes, we said something nice about jalapenos for a change). What little pork we had was moist and flavorful…the chicken? Not so much.
  • Distribution of Toppings: (3) naked chips were a problem, but tonight we need to focus on the racquetball of sour cream on top of these nachos. We had trouble actually coming up with a proper comparison for it. Golf ball was certainly too small, baseball slightly too big. Slightly…because it was a friggin’ cantaloupe of sour cream. Needless to say, we scooped it off. Our other main complaint: not enough meat. Some of us didn’t even have a piece of pork, and the chicken that we did have wasn’t very good. Our suggestion would be to eliminate the white meat (chicken) and double the other white meat (pork). Rumor has it they have hot cherry peppers, chopped avocado, and black beans. We found none of these things.
  • Price: (7) $11 for chips and sour cream? Not so much.
  • Overall: 23/40
Oh, how we wanted to love these nachos! Since the tragic passing of Our House West, we’ve longed to find another bar with couches, preferably one with a slightly more grown-up sensibility and decent nachos.  Alas, the search continues….

Tavern in the Square Porter: Family Feud

3 Sep

As the mercury rose into the mid-90’s, Tavern in the Square seemed like an excellent place to gratuitously mooch AC…and to engage in our first patrol in our new ‘hood.  But quickly after settling in, our safe haven revealed a more sinister side.  The menu seemed….suspiciously familiar.  Flipping to the back, we realized that the Tavern in the Squares are related to both Joshua Tree and CitySide, which, to put it nicely, are not exactly two of our favorite places.  Despite assurances that the Taverns are a little more upscale, the description of Tavern’s buffalo chicken nachos was IDENTICAL to those found at CitySide– a 7/40 monstrosity that is to date, the worst-rated plate of nachos we have ever tasted.  To say the least, we were skeptical…

  • Appearance: (6) We immediately questioned the structural integrity.  Why piled so high? Why not a bigger plate?  Why so much sour cream? And why the lettuce?? So many question marks, and not enough exclamation points.
  • Quality of Ingredients: (7)Nothing particularly stood out, other than the chips, which were dense, crispy and salty.
  • Distribution of Toppings: (6) We’ve finally found a use for the dreaded shredded lettuce: it makes a barrier against the even more dreaded sour cream hat, and allow for easier removal of the offending condiment!  In other news, there was a lot of cheese but the the tall, packed mass of chips made it near impossible for it to get everywhere.  The chili was on top, making it hard to grab chips without taking them from the bottom and risking collapse, reminding us once again of Jenga!
  • Price: (7)Expectedly overpriced at $12, but still too big for us to finish.
  • Overall: 26/40.  Yet another average nacho.  You may be better off trying some of their more interesting apps.

Dear Tavern in the Square/Joshua Tree/CitySide’s parents: We are seriously disappointed with your offspring.  They are no longer invited over to play.