Tag Archives: Bromance

CitySide: Behind Enemy (Green) Lines

21 Jun

Crips and Bloods, 2ge+her and Whoah,  BU and BC:  they don’t mix well.  (Although if you tossed all of them together, things could get interesting).  Hockey rivalries aside, students from the two big B-Line colleges rarely interact outside of the neutral territory that is Allston.  But nachos know no color, creed, or mascot, and in the search for the best nachos in Boston, we do not discriminate; so in the interest of intercollegiate goodwill and cooperation (and maybe a little espionage), two BU grads ventured where few had gone before: the end of the C line. The frat boys were out in full force, the girls were Catholic and under-dressed, and on this particular Saturday evening, all were preparing for a night of binge drinking and debauchery at CitySide.  We, however, were there for the nachos:


  • Appearance: (8) Patriotic and gooey, though lacking in green.  This was our own fault, we forgot to order guacamole.
  • Quality of Ingredients: (6) Two kinds of cheese, excellently melted.  The chili was oddly sweet, something we haven’t encountered since the Beantown Pub.  Still, it was tasty enough.  The chips were stale; stale enough to put a damper on the nacho experience as a whole. The salsa tasted exactly like that found in the BU dining hall; fine cuisine, no, but welcome nostalgia.  No black olives (sad face), but no jalapeños either; we call this a draw.
  • Distribution of toppings: (7) As soon as these showed up at the table we knew there would be a problem– the naked chips were out, and they were proud (not something you can say about many BC students). The salsa and sour cream on top, per usual, created a bit of a distribution nightmare, even when we resorted to forks.
  • Price: (5) $12, easily demolished by two.  Maybe that’s the norm for this part of town, but our trust funds consist of $200 in birthday money collected from Grandma over the years.  Next time we are in the mood for $12 nachos, you can catch us at Sunset with five of our closest friends.
  • Overall: (26)  Been there, done that.  BC sucks, especially at nachos.

Cactus Club: The Official Boylston Epic (Part 4)

13 Jun

Looking for overpriced Mexican food? Weak margaritas? Bro-ish atmosphere? A stuffed buffalo that occasionally breathes smoke??? Are you in the Hynes Convention Center area or willing to commute to get there? If so, than Nacho Patrol has the place for you!

Cactus Club

Located (as is the pattern these days) on scenic Boylston St. just off Mass. Ave., The Cactus Club isn’t the only restaurant in the area that provides diners with the sensual taste experience of greasy Tex-Mex. Maybe we were just there on an off-day. After all, they are said to have the best margaritas in Boston. But when your “traditional margarita” with Cuervo sets you back $10.50 and your enchilada $10, you are more inclined to notice the poor quality of the food. On that upbeat note, let’s wax nacho:

  • Appearance: (9) For all the crap they do wrong, Cactus Club certainly has presentation down to a science. Despite a little char, these nachos were absolutely beautiful, as fresh and bright as a sunny day.
  • Quality of Ingredients: ( 7 ) how refreshing to get some black beans! It went a long way it battening down the chili powder hatches, which seemed to have blown open in some sort of Incident. It was literally a chili powder keg, reminiscent of some childhood mess your mother made in the crock pot. However, we did enjoy the pico (a little chili-ey itself) and the lemony guac.
  • Distribution of Toppings: (7) We suspect Cactus Club may have, at some point, hijacked Cabot Farms to fund the massive volume of cheese used on these nachos. The farmers weep and the cows’ udders are utterly tapped. At that same point, somewhere on the coast, three Nacho Patrollers simultaneously witness the glory of oh-so-much gooey cheese while attempting to chisel the clots out of their hearts. Luckily the excitement brought us back to life–it only took as a little digging to discover that the cheese was simply a ruse to disguise the plate of naked chips below. Sure, there was a lot, but in not layering it, the “cheese helmet” cooled and congealed quickly, making for an unpleasant and difficult nacho experience. Also, this could be nit-picky, but the wax paper underneath the nachos often proved to be problematic.
  • Price: (5) $12 for this particular plate, which we officially award the “Biggest Rip-Off Award” in Nachos. They do offer an $8 option, sans meat and guac. $8 for chips and cheese. A travesty!
  • Overall: (29/40)

Boylston, Boylston, Boylston…What shall these Nacho-Lovers do with you? After our overrated margaritas and wallet-cleaning nachos, we considered being sad. But then we remembered that Pour House is right next door…and there was much rejoicing.

The Avenue: Places We Hate To Admit We’ve Been (Part 1)

9 Jun

AvenueIf you’ve ever been to Allston, Massachusetts, you know it isn’t exactly a high class destination. On an average Wednesday night, you’re liable to see more than a few coeds passed out in bushes and your fair share of homeless drunks. Yes, Nacho Patrol loves Allston. They love it so much that they avoid it all costs. They go out of their way to drive around it and they tend to block out any ineluctable visits, mentally categorizing them as traumatic life events. As one might guess, this has made Patrolling our most recent nacho destination, The Avenue, all the more difficult.

The Avenue has everything you might expect from a “college bar.” $1.50 drafts of shitty beer, extreme fighting on one television and bikini models on another, unlimited opportunities for bromance, and copious drunk thugs attempting to hit on you (places we’d recommend Doc Martens and a burka–check). They boast having “like a hundred” taps (according to our waitress), but in reality have about 20, at least 1/5 of them Budweiser products. But for the nacho connoiseur, they also have a nice selection of nachos–everything from your average cheese to your more advanced chicken and chili. On this particular Sunday night, the six of us enjoyed the chili nachos (they were out of gauc…how sad).

Disclaimer: It was far into the night, and we have little recollection of the details of these nachos, save for a very dark photo on a cellphone and a memory of general satisfaction.

  • Appearance: ( 8 ) Pretty tasty-looking?
  • Quality of Ingredients: (6) Everything was good, but the chili was too watery making the chips moist and floppy. It also was rather flavorless–something you could easily make at home.
  • Distribution of Toppings: ( 8 ) more cheese than you can shake a stick at made for excellent distribution. We wished they had guac, but as Skyler confessed, we “like that they have lots of cheese.”
  • Price: ( 7 ) $10 split 6 ways
  • Overall: (29) Good, but not very memorable.  Part of that may be our problem, though we venture that many of the people who eat the nachos here will be in the same state.