Tag Archives: Boylston Bars

Pour House Redux: Sloppy Seconds

12 Mar

Nacho Patrol prides itself on never leading its readers and loyal fans astray. The thought of promoting a bad plate of nachos breaks the clogged arteries where our hearts used to be. But at the same time, we’re admitted sissies…for over a year we’ve been too scared to go back to Pour House because we didn’t want to risk our review of the #1 nachos in Boston. What if they weren’t that good? What if they’d raised the price? What if the cheese wasn’t as melty, the chili not as spicy, the chips not as crunchy? Our top tier nacho spank-bank contributor would be ravished! Rather than take that chance, we’ve gone fifteen months without monitoring the situation at Pour House. But now, bolstered by Spring Break and myriad naughty thoughts about Joe Mauer, we were ready to make our triumphant return to Pour House.

However, there was one small problem: we’re giant failures.

Because of technical difficulties and general stupidity on our part and on the part of the lone crazy guy waiting tables in the basement of Pour House, we can’t call this an actual review. Still, look at those babies! That’s about 5 stories of nacho goodness through and through. If you ignore the fact these are sans chili and black beans (failure #1), Pour House nachos are looking ripe for nacho perfection. The price is still right: $8.50 for their Nachos Grande, which handily defeated three Patrollers. And the flavors are all still there: yummy chili, fresh salsa, decent black beans. The cheese was a bit scant, but we blame that in part on what we had to do to actually make these Nachos Grande:

That’s right. They got our order wrong (failure #2). We’ll take the blame for compounding the problem by simply ordering a bowl of chili and a bowl of beans to dump on top. By the time the ingredients were assembled, the cheese was stiff and the chips were soggy. Distribution was a problem and by the end we had ourselves a mess of sour cream and floppy, naked chips. Now that’s just depressing.

Nacho Patrol can be accused of bias: maybe we want these nachos to be the best so we ignore the failings. Then again, we’re a team of optimists. We see the best in a plate of nachos and we recognize the potential for greatness. The moral of the story is this: when you go to Pour House (and you should. Often.) do what you have to do to get the Nachos Grande. Make sure that crazy waiter hears you. Keep your ID’s out and ready for action if you want a beer. Maybe bring a trumpet-style hearing aid if your hearing is at all compromised. But whatever you do, GET EXCITED: for the moment, these are the best nachos in Boston!

Nacho Average Monday: Scoring Changes and Our February 22nd Review

23 Feb

Something delicious happened at The Rattlesnake yesterday, but before we get to that, we have something to note regarding our Nacho Avg. Monday reviewing.

We’re going to make a little change to rating system for Nacho Avg. Monday: instead of wracking our brains for interesting ways to say “cheese sauce=good distribution,” we’re eliminating the distribution score all together and trial-running a 1-10 “innovenuity” tally (the juxtaposition of innovation and ingenuity). Past Nacho Avg. Monday reviews will be adjusted accordingly.

Now, only the business at hand.

February 22nd: a beautiful day transitioned into a cold, cold night. BU students, wearing only sweatshirts, were out in force and looking confused. Sad news of a friend left us in a somber mood and ski jumping  stole any remaining strand of rational thought we had (how do they get so horizontal!?!?). Nonetheless, we persevered, excited to try a nacho sporting two of our fantasy ingredients, brie and mushrooms.

The fare: Arugula and spinach gently tossed in grilled portobello and truffle viniagrette–grilled crimini & tear drop tomato salsa, basil and garlic cheese sauce, brie cheese crumbles & jalapeno citrus roasted beet guacamole.

  • Appearance: (9) Look at those colors! We credit the beets and tomatoes for the amazing color palate Mr. Poe presented us with tonight. After all, how often do you see the wonderful creamy purplish pink of beets on your nachos? Splashing in a fleck of green from the spinach and arugula and the pop of a few cherry tomatoes, it was a great (and delicious) change from the traditional dark reds and yellows.
  • Quality: (8) The cheese sauce actually tasted different than normal (and by that, we mean it had a taste).  We loved the juicy, rosemary-suffused mushrooms, which served as a meaty stand-in for the usual carnivorous main ingredient.  The beet guacamole was hearty and delicious, providing a chunky guacamole texture with a fresh yet earthy flavor.
  • Innovenuity: (9)  Who knew you could turn beets into guacamole?  What’s next, water into wine, lead into gold?  We loved this unexpected take on a beloved food. Beet alchemy!  Our one complaint: a large, completely unnecessary dollop of sour cream on top of the whole thing.  We aren’t huge fans of sour cream in general, and especially on top of nachos, where it hampers distribution and masks all the other flavors.  On these nachos, it was especially unwelcome and cloying, leading us hope that it was placed there by accident, not on purpose.
  • Overall: 26/30.  Unexpected, innovative, and delicious.  What more could one ask for?

Poe’s Kitchen Nacho Average Monday #3: (Un)Happy as a Clam

5 Feb

It has been a good couple of days for Nacho Patrol. Not only have we joined the 21st Century by getting a Facebook Page and a Twitter (we still don’t know what @ or # means, but we hope to have it figured out by the time the next big social networking media hits the market), but we also enjoyed a wonderful night at The Rattlesnake courtesy of Brian Poe, Laura, and the trivia teams that were worse than us. In another news Nacho Patrol gets creative at Poe’s Kitchen? More news on that in a few days, but for now, we’ve got some reviewing to do!

This week Poe’s Kitchen offered New England Nachos: clam chowder puree, fried Ipswich clams, bacon, celery and onion salsa, and a thyme vinaigrette. As Mya would say, it was “like woah.”

  • Appearance: (6) a little blah, and when you factor in the strange black stuff in the fried clams (we try to avoid eating filter feeders whenever possible) and the grayish color of the batter, we felt ourselves only slightly repulsed. Setting that aside, we thought the splash of color provided by the salsa offered a nice contrast to the creamy off-white chowder.
  • Distribution: (7) We’d love for the Rattlesnake to pay a little more attention to distribution. With a mass of chips, it’s easy to end up with a situation in which the sauce takes over while the other ingredients fall to the wayside (or our bellies). There was certainly enough of everything (and by that we mean, not enough bacon), but it wasn’t where it mattered most. That is all we will say on the matter for this week.
  • Quality: (6) Let’s preface this by saying, Nacho Patrol are fish people. We’ve been advocating for calamari and marinara on nachos since the dawn of time. Recently, we’ve been devising methods to put salmon and a delicious creamy dill sauce on chips. So, this isn’t a matter of saying, “well, they just don’t know how to eat fish.” Fried clams on nachos just didn’t work. They just aren’t flavorful enough to carry a nacho plate.   On another note, we’re told the clam chowder at Rattlesnake is delicious–but with so many other flavors blended in it was hard to get an unadulterated look at the sauce. And as always, the salsa and vinaigrette could do us no wrong. If we had it our way, we’d put bacon on everything. Once again, a bottle of cholula was kept close at hand to compensate for the general lack of salt/flavor.
  • Overall: 19/30. Our least favorite so far.  But we have reason to be hopeful for next week….